Archive for the ‘Playing the Networking Game’ Category

If you’re a member of a networking group that meets on a regular basis, you’ll be very aware of the focus on keeping a steady flow of visitors coming along to the meetings.  This needs to happen for a number of reasons;

• One of the reasons we network is to expand our personal contact sphere and visitors help us do this.
• New visitors always add energy to the room and will, usually, enhance the meeting.
• Most networking groups are looking to grow and some of the visitors may well decide to join.
• In a referral networking group, visitors do pass referrals -  if they have a need represented in the room.
• If a member has a need represented by a visitor, that visitor may receive an opportunity to do business.
• A visitor may prove to be a great referral partner for one or more of the members – even if they don’t choose to join the group.
• Strategic alliances can also develop between members and visitors providing excellent, ongoing business opportunities for both party’s.

This is not an exclusive list and all of these things are, of course, dependent on the appropriate relationship developing but you can see the great benefits that visitors bring to a meeting.

As members, we tend to judge the visitors that come along from our own perspective but it’s easy to forget that they, too, will be making their own judgements.

They will be judging us as individuals,  judging our businesses and judging the networking group that we belong to – and all this from their experience at a single meeting.

A survey was carried out a few years ago asking people what their biggest fear is.  Surprisingly, the fear of dying only managed to make it to No. 3!   At No.2 was the fear of entering a room full of strangers and at No.1 was the fear of public speaking.

Given that many networking groups expect everyone in attendance to deliver a short presentation about their business, the results of this survey only highlight the fact that many of us are stepping way outside of our comfort zones when we go networking.  Particularly when visiting a new group for the first time.

As members, it’s really important that we’re mindful of the fact that many visitors will feel very ill at ease when they come to a meeting and we need to treat them in a way that ensures that they feel welcomed, valued and included throughout the meeting.  In fact, I think we need to make sure that they get a ‘warm and fuzzy’ feeling about their experience.

After all, no-one joins a networking organisation, they join the people in the room.  Not to mention the fact that, as I mentioned earlier, they are judging us, our businesses and the group by their experience.

The challenge with this is that members also share these very same fears and this can manifest itself in networking groups appearing to be cliquey.   Members can slip into the habit of getting into small groups and talking to their fellow members – their friends – and not talking to the visitors, which can result in visitors feeling excluded and getting a bad impression.

It’s our responsibility to make sure that all members are aware of this ‘fear factor’ and are constantly paying attention to visitors, making sure that they’re not left alone or left talking to other visitors without any member in attendance.  We need to actively include them in the group at all times and this is especially critical if we’re looking to grow our group.

If you’ve ever invited a visitor to your group only for them not to turn up on the day, don’t judge them too harshly.  It may just be that having to step outside of their comfort zone, in this way, got the better of them.  Give them the benefit of the doubt.

Always remember that many people find networking a pretty scary experience so, if you treat them accordingly, you’ll find that the early stages in new relationships will develop much more quickly, that visitors to your networking group will be far more likely to join and you’ll get visitors recommending your group to their contacts.

Happy networking.

Steve Bimpson

When we think about networking, providing we’re looking at it from the right perspective, we think about building relationships with people.

I’ve seen this video several times but was reminded of it, today, when a friend of mine (Chris Antingham-Holdsworth) re-posted it in one of his regular ‘Positive Thinking’ updates on LinkedIn.   I thought I’d share it with you because there are some valuable insights into what we can be doing to build relationships.  Enjoy;

What a fantastic, heartwarming story.

For me, the lesson is this:   The little things that we can do for people that are, truly, ‘from the heart’ are often the most powerful things that we can do when building a relationship.

So, get your thinking cap on!

• What little things can you do that will endear the people you meet, to you?
• What simple things can you do to lay the foundation stones for a great relationship?
• What things can you do that show people how much you care about them?
• What things can you do to make people want to get to know you?

And remember.   These things don’t have to cost you much, if any, money.  In fact, I would go as far as to say that the things that will have the most powerful effect will only cost you in terms of the time you invest in them and the quality of the thinking and intention behind them.

At the end of the day, if you want to be valued in a relationship (ANY kind of relationship) then you have to BE valuable to that relationship.

Steve Bimpson

To take a quick re-cap. In Part 1, we looked at Visibility in our relationship and the 3 steps on the ladder that we need to go through whilst developing the  stage in the relationships that we have.

The first step is Awareness which is that time when we first come into contact with someone, which can happen in any number of different ways.

Familiarity is Step 2. Now we’re at a stage in the relationship where people start to recognise us or our name.   And vice versa.

As people start to Know & Like you, you move on to Step 3. Just remember that knowing you is not, usually, enough.  People need to like you if you want to move up to the next Step.

As people start to develop confidence in you you start to develop credibility and move up to Step 4.  Inspiring people’s confidence in us is what it’s all about.  And the activities we need to engage in are the same ones we need to be engaging in to move up onto Step 5 where people develop trust in you.  It’s simply a process where people start to trust you as their confidence grows.

So. lets now move on to the final two Steps on the relationship ladder.  Those two where we start to move into the realms of creating Profitabilty from the relationship.

Step 6

Once you’ve fully established your Credibility, once the Confidence and the Trust that people have in you (and in what you do) grows to a certain level, they will start to develop a degree of Reliance upon you.  At this point you’ve now climbed up on to the 6^th rung on the Relationship Ladder.

Every step on the ladder is important but once you’ve got up to the Reliance step it’s essential that you work to maintain everything that you’ve now achieved and consolidate your position.

When people start to develop Reliance on you, you need to demonstrate that their Reliance is justified so that it continues to develop.  Consolidation is the name of the game here and you achieve that by doing more of the same.  Every step you’ve taken, everything you’ve given, every way that you’ve found to add value to the relationship, so far, you simply need to do more of.

When people become Reliant on you it means that, if they have a need for your product or service themselves, they wouldn’t consider using anyone else, at all.  You would be their first, and probably, only port of call.

It also means that they would be highly likely to refer you in the event that someone asked if they knew anyone that does what you do.  They have confidence in you and they trust you and they would refer you to the most important people in their personal contact sphere.  However, on this Step of the relationship ladder, their referrals would tend to be reactive ones.  That is, they will refer you when the subject of your product or service comes up.

Step 7

The final Step on the relationship ladder, the pinnacle that we all should be aiming for, is when people become a Raving Fan, both of you, and of what you do.  This is when everything that you’ve been working for comes together.

You’ve moved up the ladder from Awareness to Familiarity and then on to Knowing & Liking.  You’ve established Confidence which has developed into Trust and you’ve moved beyond the level of Reliance.

So, what differentiates a Raving Fan from someone who’s Reliant on you?

Well, a Raving Fan doesn’t just refer you should the occasion arrive, they proactively look to refer you.

Being proactive about referring you means that they actively seek out opportunities to refer their contacts to you.  They want to help you get as much business as possible and will be proactively looking for opportunities to create a referral for you.

For example, let’s say that you supply and install hardwood flooring.  Someone that’s reliant on you is talking with a contact about the fact that they’re having some work done on their house.  If that contact happens to mention the fact that they want a hardwood floor as part of the work they’re having done, you will be referred to them.  However, if they don’t mention the flooring, you won’t be.

If that person we’re a raving fan they would start asking questions about the work being done and even ask, directly, what they were planning to do with the flooring.  They ask these questions because they’re trying to create a referral for you at every opportunity.

This is the pinnacle, the top Step on the relationship ladder.  It’s from the level of this Step that you will gain the maximum profitability from any relationship.  Of course, the maximum profitability is gained when each of you are on the others’ top Step and the relationship becomes a real win – win scenario.

And there we have it; 7 Steps to a Profitable Relationship.  It’s the way we move through the Visibility and Credibility stages to create Profitability from our relationships.  But there are some things that you need to remember;

• Building a relationship requires an investment of time.  It doesn’t just happen.
• Whatever you give to help build a relationship must be given without any kind of attachment.  Without any expectation of getting anything in return.
• You have control over how long it takes to build a relationship but it does take two of you to have one – and the Know & Like part is very important.
• Never force any part of the process.  Doing so will only result in you dropping down the ladder rather than moving up.
• It’s far easier to move down the ladder than it is to move up it.
• If you do happen to move down the relationship ladder, it will probably take more time to move back up than it originally did.
• If you always do what you say you’re going to do, you’re unlikely to slip down.
• Whatever you do, make it fun.

Finally, remember that everyone you know has a ladder for you and that you have a ladder for everyone you know.  You should always be thinking about where you want to be on someones ladder, where you actually are on their ladder and on what you need to do in order to move up to where you want to be.  And if you’re not sure, try sharing this information with them and then asking them.

Here’s wishing you some exceptionally profitable relationships.

Steve Bimpson

In Part 1, we talked about the 3 steps on the ladder that we go through whilst developing Visibility in the relationships that we have.

The first step is Awareness, that moment in time when people first come into contact with us.  Either when they meet us in person or when they hear about us, in whatever way that may happen.

Step 2 is Familiarity.  This is the point when people start to recognise you or your name.  Interestingly, you don’t have to actually meet people to get on to this second step.

Step 3 is when people start to Know & Like you.  This is when the relationship is starting to develop quite nicely, ready to move it on to the next phase.

The next phase is all about building Credibility and the steps we need to move through in order to gain credibility in our relationships.

Steps 4 & 5

You know when you’re on the 4^th and then 5th ‘rungs’ on someone’s relationship ladder when they start to display a level of Confidence and then Trust, both in you and in what you do.  This is a very important development in your relationship and moves you in to the realms of having Credibility in this particular relationship.

People are very unlikely to refer a personal contact to anyone that they don’t see as being credible.  At least, not without making that referral with lots and lots of qualification and, effectively, removing any endorsement of the person being referred to their contact.

Given that the type of referrals we all look for are those that are accompanied by a powerful endorsement of us, and of what we do.  Having a high level of credibility is essential if we want to achieve this.

So what are some of the things that you can do to make sure that people develop Confidence and then Trust in you?

• Keep developing the relationship – and develop it socially, as well as from a business perspective.  The more that people like you, the more confidence they will have in you and the more inclined they’ll be to trust you.
• If you want to be trusted, be trusting.  Personally, I always assume that I can trust people, at least to some degree, from the moment I meet them.  I may not show them a major level of trust to begin with but I adjust that level based on results – and people can go down my scale of trust much faster than they can move up it.  Of course, if they do move down the scale, they have to work far, far harder to move back up it, again.
• One way of showing confidence and  trust is by giving referrals to the people that you would like to have refer to you.  It’s one way that we can invoke the Law of Reciprocity.  It may be that you qualify those referrals in the eyes of your contacts.  i.e. Tell your contact that you don’t know the person you’re referring them to, that well, and that you aren’t personally familiar with their work so can’t endorse it.  On those occasions where your contact may have to resort to Yellow Pages or Google, talking to someone that’s known, even just a little, is no bad thing.  They should just be considered on an equal footing with those people from the directories but the great thing is that you have given something in your new relationship.
• Always make sure that you do what you say you’re going to do, no matter how small that thing may be and no matter whether it’s a business or a personal undertaking.  If you don’t do what you say you say you will do, it will affect the way that you are perceived.
• In a similar vein, don’t promise to do something if you can’t do it well.  Rather, refer someone that can do it well.  The fact that you’d be willing to do something badly wouldn’t reflect well on you.
• Make sure that you have a high level of knowledge and skill in your field so that, whenever you have occasion to demonstrate that knowledge or skill, you can do so, effectively.
• Give knowledge, skill, information and introductions whenever you can.  Doing all of these things will help build your credibility, particularly, if you’ve gone out of your way to help and don’t expect anything in return.  So, do go out of your way to help and don’t expect anything in return.  If you do that, everything else takes care of itself.
• In your business, always deliver your product or service to the highest standards.  Always focus on looking after your clients and making them feel valued.  Don’t give anyone any cause for complaint, no matter what lengths you need to go to.  Why?  Because people that are just getting to know you will ask their contacts about you – and you never know who those contacts may be.  At the end of the day, if you want to get referrals, you need to be referable.

Of course, there are many other things that you can do.  Just use your creativity and I’m sure that you’ll come up with things that I haven’t thought of.  And if these things also happen to relate to your business in some way, that would be an added benefit.

Bear in mind that it does take time to gain credibility and, as everyone is different, some people will require more time than others.  But you can affect the time taken by investing more of your own time in to doing more of those things that will build the relationship.

As you do more of these things, so you will move up to Step 4, Confidence and then to Step 5, Trust.

Never forget that you’re in control of the process involved in moving up this relationship ladder.  You simply have to take action and engage in those activities that will build the relationship.

From steps 1 to 3 we built Visibility in our relationship.  Having moved from step 3 to steps 4 & 5  we’ve now firmly established our Credibility.

Tune in to part 3 of the 7 Steps to a Profitable Relationship to find out about the last two steps that will bring us the Profitability that we’ve been working towards.

Steve Bimpson

For those of you familiar with Dr Ivan Misner, the founder of BNI, you may be familiar with his formula for developing profitable relationships;

V + C = P

Where V = Visibility, C = Credibility and P = Profitability.

The key thing to note, here, is that relationships don’t just happen, you have to work at them to develop them to the point where they become profitable.  It’s also worth noting that ‘profitable’, in this context, doesn’t necessarily relate to a monetary profit.  The important thing is that there should be a mutual benefit gained by both parties in the relationship.

Yes, you can apply this philosophy to any kind of relationship, not just a business networking relationship.  It applies equally to the mutual benefit gained through developing a relationship with your life partner, your children, business contacts or friends.  In fact, it applies equally to any type of relationship you can think of.

For me, a truly profitable business relationship is one where the parties involved are keen to refer one another to business opportunities.

This is referral networking.  You might think of a profit as obtaining a sale.  And there is value to this, but building that relationship to the stage where there is a desire to refer one another is the pinnacle that we should be aiming for.

I like to break down this relationship building process into smaller chunks to help me understand and grade the relationships that I have with different people.  And I think of these steps as the ‘rungs’ of a ‘ladder’ that I wish to climb – Hence, “7 Steps to a Profitable Relationship”.

It probably seems obvious to say this but I’m going to, anyway.

You have a different ‘ladder’ for each individual relationship that you have and you’re, almost certainly, on a different ‘rung’ of the ‘ladder’ with different people.

So, if you have relationships that you don’t think are bringing you the reward that you think they should be, whatever kind of reward that may be, understanding this philosophy will help you realise which ‘rung’ you’re on with those people and, more importantly, it will help you to identify what you need to do to move that relationship up the following steps to where you want it to be.

The first 3 steps on the ladder relate to building your Visibility.

Step 1

The first ‘rung’ on the ‘ladder’ is Awareness.  It’s that point in time when someone becomes aware of you – and it only happens once.  They say that you only have a few seconds to make a great first impression so this first step is quite important.  However, if you don’t quite make the first impression that you’d like to, all is not lost.

Building a relationship is a process and all processes take time.  You do have control over how long it may take because you can choose how much time and effort you put into building that particular relationship.

But, you shouldn’t be seen to be rushing it as that will send out the wrong message.

So, how do people become aware of you?  That can happen in a number of different ways and, as I’m relating this specifically to the process of business networking, I’m going to talk about the ways people may become aware of you from a business perspective.

This is not a definitive list of how people may become aware of you but it should give you the general idea.

• You may meet them in person either at a business networking meeting, a business meeting or socially.
• You may send them a piece of direct mail or an email.
• They may get referred to you.
• You may talk to them on the telephone.
• In the world of social media you may ‘connect’ with them through LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, Ecademy or any other of a plethora of social media platforms.
• They may contact you in response to an advert or other marketing activity.
• They may hear about you by reputation.

There are other ways that they may cross your path but the point is, this is the first time that they ever come across you and it’s the very first step towards building a profitable relationship.  In fact, this first step may involve them coming across you more than once.

Step 2

You get on to someone’s 2^nd ‘rung’ of the ladder when they develop a degree of Familiarity with you.   By familiarity, I mean that they at least recognise your name.  It’s entirely possible to get on to the familiarity step with someone simply because they come across you on more than one occasion.

For instance, the following could happen;

• You send a piece of direct mail to someone and it creates enough interest for them to read it and take note of it.
• Perhaps they may have a possible need for the product or service that you mentioned in your direct mail piece but they’re still doing their research.  So, you follow up with a further mailing.  Or
• You follow up with a telephone call or an email.
• Because of their interest in what you do they speak to a few colleagues or associates to see whether any of them know you – or know of you.  Perhaps one of them knows you quite well and endorses you.

Each of these steps represents another event that causes them to come across you again.  As a result, they start to develop that all important Familiarity.  You’re now on the 2^nd ‘rung’ of the ladder.

This is just for illustration but, hopefully, you get the point.

Now, it’s not essential that you have to actually speak to someone for you to move up to the second ‘rung’ on their ladder but you will have to speak to them if you have any aspirations, at all, to moving up to their 3^rd ‘rung’.

Of course, a face to face meeting is even better.

Having said that, I do know a number of people that build relationships using nothing more than social media and a telephone.  They simply don’t do face to face at all.  In fact, sometimes, they build relationships over long distances or internationally which makes it very difficult for a face to face meeting, in any case.   Maybe, it’s those occasions where face to face is very difficult that has led to this creative use of Social Media and a phone.  Sometimes, there’s just no alternative.

I must confess that, as a fan of face to face communication, I used to find it a little strange to think about building a relationship without meeting.  But some people have developed hugely profitable relationships without ever having met and I’ve made a point of learning as much as I can about Social Media Marketing to enable me to build strong relationships over long distances.

Step 3

The 3^rd ‘rung’ on the ladder is when people start to get to know & Like you.  In this instance, I’m going to work on the assumption that you’ve now met them in order to move up to that all important 3^rd step.  Of course, although we don’t want to appear to be rushing the development of the relationship, we do want to move it forward as soon as we can, and you may like to consider some of the following steps to help move you to that 3^rd ‘rung’;

• Meet for coffee.
• Meet for lunch.
• Give them something that they will value.  A report of some kind relating to some aspect of their business.  Or some useful information of another sort.
• Do them a favour.  The bigger, the better.
• Introduce them to someone who will be a great contact for them.
• Help them to overcome a particular challenge that they’re having.

Do you get the idea?

Remember.  Whatever you do, whatever you give, do so without expectation of anything in return.  Do it without attachment.  You see, if people think that you’re doing something simply to get something in return, they won’t see what you do as being sincere and they’re less likely to want to give to you, in return.

On the other hand, if you have no expectation of getting anything in return you will come across as being completely genuine and they will want to give back to you.  It’s the ‘Law of Reciprocity’ in action.

You see, it’s not just important for them to get to know you but, more importantly, they need to get to like you.  If they don’t like you, you’re highly unlikely to get on to that 3^rd ‘rung’ of the ladder.

So, you’ll only get on to the 3^rd step when they start to Know & Like you.

These are the 3 steps in a relationship that build your Visibility.  In the next part we’ll look at those steps involved in building your Credibility and, from there, moving you into Profitability.

See you next time.

Steve Bimpson

Networking in Business

Networking in business is something that you should be doing  on a regular basis.  As discussed elsewhere, there are a variety of different networking events you can go to but you should have a balanced approach.  There are more formal, structured networking events that usually involve membership and take place quite frequently, less formal, less frequent events and one off events.

If you’re going to any networking event, particularly a ‘one-off’ event, you should always plan your approach.  Depending on the nature of the event, there may be some additional things that you need to do but, in the main, these is are 6 key things that I would recommend.

Firstly – You need to take your “Networking Toolkit”.  This consists of;
•    A generous supply of business cards – always carry a spare box or two in the car as a backup.
•    Take a nice pen and something to write on, just in case you need to make any notes.
•    Take a Name Badge.  If the event you’re going to doesn’t provide them, always have one of your own to hand.  Make sure your name is large and prominent so that it can easily be read at a distance.  People will approach you, quite readily, if they can easily read your name.
•    Make sure that you have prepared your ‘Elevator Pitch’ or introduction.  You know you’ve got this right if people ask you a question after you’ve delivered it.
•    Prepare some great networking questions.
•    And don’t forget to take a Great Attitude!   Attitude isn’t everything  ……….  but it does come close.

This is all you need to take with you.  Don’t take any promotional literature, you won’t need it.  Remember, the aim of networking is not to launch into a sales pitch but to make useful contacts.  

Secondly – Have a plan and set yourself one or two simple objectives.  Think about the contacts you are actually looking for.  You may make contacts in the following areas;
•    Potential customers – I know I shouldn’t need to say it but I’m going to: Don’t Sell To The Room!  Remember that you’re networking not selling.  Relationships come first.
•    Potential suppliers – How much money can you save by changing suppliers?
•    People with whom you could create a strategic alliance that benefits both of you.
•    Potential referrers for your business.
Identify what types of business are your Prime Target before you before you go and decide how many contacts you want to make and in which of the areas, listed above.  Make sure that you get everyone’s business cards.

Thirdly – Always get there early.  I’ve made some really good contacts by arriving early and it’s easier to get talking to someone when there are fewer people around.  You’ll also get to meet the hosts, which is always a good thing.  In fact, if you’re very early, offer to help out with the final preparations.   It’s a great way to give and will put the Law of Reciprocity to work.

Don’t forget, of course, that you’re going there to network.  If you get there part way through the event you’ve lost some of the opportunity open to you.  Remember, it’s called network not net bugger about and you do need to put the time in!

Meet & Greet

Fourth – Make a great first impression by smiling, making good eye contact and giving a good handshake.  And remember, you have two ears and one mouth.  Make sure that you use them in that proportion.

Fifth – Work the room.  Whatever you do, don’t allow yourself to get too caught up with just one or two people.  Keep circulating until you’ve met your objectives.

Finally – Follow Up.  We’ve all heard that the fortune is in the follow up.  So, follow up promptly and follow up with everyone you’ve spoken to.  In particular, you need to follow up with those on your Prime target list.   The aim at this point is to do something to move the relationship forward.  Arrange to meet them for a coffee, or something, and start building those relationships.  Your focus should always be on how you can help them.

Networking is great fun so, enjoy yourself.

Steve Bimpson

I’d like to tell you an interesting story that a fellow BNI member told recently.

John Crouch works for Crest Windows and Conservatories and is a fellow member of the Meon  Valley Flyers chapter of BNI.  During one of his 60 second presentations, he told the story of a lady who enquired about new, uPVC windows and doors.

The lady was new to the area and had, literally, just moved in to the house she had just bought.  The house had previously been let out and, although everything looked fine on the surface, once she’d moved in she became very aware that there had been quite a lot of poor quality work carried out that had been done, simply to make everything look good on the surface.  This included both electrical and plumbing work that was, actually, quite dangerous.

When John arrived, the lady was very upset, in tears, because of the problems she had discovered.  John felt for the lady, being on her own in an area where she didn’t know anyone.  He explained to her about BNI and that he knew a plumber and an electrician that she could rely on.  He asked if she would like him to get them to call her to get things put right and she said that she would really appreciate the introduction.

John decided that it wasn’t an appropriate time to talk about new windows and doors, so he made an appointment to go back a few days later.

When he returned, he was greeted with a hug.  His fellow BNI members had reacted promptly and, between them, they’d sorted out the electrical and plumbing issues and made sure that everything was safe.  The lady was very appreciative of Johns help and told him that she really felt that she could trust him.

As a consequence, even though she had originally planned to get 3 separate quotatins for the windows and doors, she told John that she had cancelled the other two companies and that he had got her business.  Even though he hadn’t even given her a quotation at that time.

How many people benetitted from this act of giving?

1. John gave referrals to two fellow members of BNI and they both benefitted from that, in terms of the business they received.
2. The lady in question benefitted from the fact that she had been put in touch with two completely reliable tradespeople who helped her resolve her problems quickly and professionally.
3. Johns’ act of giving also reflected on him.  Not only were his BNI colleagues very grateful for the referrals that he gave them but, more importantly, the lady he referred them to was so grateful for the help she received that she, spontaneously, decided that she would reward him the contract for her new windows and doors – without even talking to anyne else.

When we give, we activate the Law of Cause and Effect, as well as many other of the Universal Laws we’ve previously talked about.

In this story we can see that the act of giving these referrals naturally benefits the people that we give them to, but it also benefits the individual referred, in this case, our lady in distress.  But we should never forget that these acts also reflect on the giver.  In this instance, the consequence of that was revealed very quickly, indeed,  which is not what I would necessarily expect, but it will always reflect on the giver, in some way.

So, in answer to the question “How Many People Benefit When We Give?” we can clearly see that it’s not only the people on the receiving end but it’s the person doing the giving, as well.

The fact is, when we give to someone else, we also give to ourselves, as well.  When we come to understand this – and really do ‘get it’, why on earth wouldn’t we give all that we can give?

When it comes to networking, never forget that when you give to others, you’re also giving to yourself.

Steve Bimpson

If we want to build relationships that result in us receiving referrals (Referral Networking) then we have to be prepared to give referrals or, at least, give something of true value to those people that we are in these relationships with.  After all, it’s a little arrogant of us to expect others to give us something if we’re not prepared to give something of equal value to them.

In fact, we have to give first, sometimes over and over and over again, to create reciprocity in others.  Particularly, where we have instigated the building of this relationship and where we are interested in the relationship delivering the kind of result we would like it to.

Whether we’ve instigated the relationship or not, if it’s important to us,  then there is something that we need to understand and it’s a real contradiction in terms that can take a bit of getting our head around.

Even though we’ve built this relationship with a view to generating referrals for our own business we mustn’t approach the relationship in this way.  When we take into account the “Universal Laws of Success in Networking” then we start to realise that building these relationships are all about what we give and not about what we receive.

For instance, the Law of Cause and Effect is all about sewing and reaping, about every effect having a cause.  Therefore, if we want to receive something then there has to be a cause first.

We have to sew the seeds and then nurture them.  That’s the fundamental Law of the Universe.

The Law of Attraction, as discussed at length in “The Secret”, talks about us attracting into our lives the people, places and circumstances that are aligned with our thoughts.

If we’re thinking about the referrals that we want to recieve, we will attract into our lives other people that are thinking the same way.  If all parties in the relationship are thinking about what they can take, where will it come from?

The Law of Reciprocity states that people want to pay you back for what you do for them or for what you give to them.  So by giving something of value or doing something of value for someone, they will have a natural desire to want to reciprocate.

If all we are doing is waiting for what we want from the relationship (referrals) then the other party will, almost certainly, reciprocate by doing exactly the same – waiting!

The Law of Compensation says that whatever you put in, you will get out.  You will always be compensated in full for whatever you do.

If we don’t “do” anything in this relationship, what level of compensation are we going to receive?

Whether we like to hear it or not, we really don’t get something for nothing and there are clues to this all around us.  Most of us simply don’t listen, or just don’t understand.   So, for the sake of clarity, let’s define exactly what the true nature of giving is or, at least, should be.

• When we give, we are taking an action of some kind.  This action is a “cause” and it will produce an “effect”.   Trust me when I tell you this and trust that it will come back to you.  Just make sure that what you give is of good intention and good value to the recipient.
• We must give without attachment, condition or expectation of what will come in return.  In keeping with the Law of Attraction the attachment, condition or expectation will have a wholly negative affect on the giving.  At best this will mean that anything we receive will come with its’ own attachment, condition or expectation.  At worst the act of giving will be completely negated.
• Giving should be a habit.  It’s something that we should practice all of the time and in all aspects of our life.  Certainly, not just in our business – and not just because we’re trying to generate referrals.  If giving isn’t something that we do as a matter of course, then the power that comes from giving, will be restricted.
• If we stop giving it’s usually to wait to see what comes of what we’ve already given.  This creates an attachment, condition or expectation and it will have a negative effect on what you receive.  If you stop giving, you’ll also stop the flow of receiving because the two are inextricably linked.
• Understand that what you receive may not come from where you would expect.  In fact, if you’re expecting it to come from somewhere, you’re creating an expectation, or condition, linked to your act of giving.  Just trust that you will sew what you reap.  That what goes around, comes around.  And don’t forget that it usually comes back to you magnified!

The fundamental aim of networking-in-business.com is to help everyone understand how networking really works.  To help them realise that success in networking starts and finishes with what we give and not what we receive.

If everyone out there networking simply waited to see what business/referrals they would get, they’d all be waiting a very, very long time.

Don’t go making that most fundamental of errors, yourself.  Give freely, without attachment, and trust in the Universal Laws.  They ONLY work!!

Steve Bimpson

I first heard about the concept of 6 Degrees of Separation more than 10 years ago at a seminar I attended.  The idea is a simple one; that we are all linked to anyone we may care to meet through no more than 6 levels of contacts. This whole idea certainly opened my mind to the potential of networking, although, I must say I was somewhat sceptical about it to begin with.

It was only when I started talking to other people about the whole idea that the concept of 6 Degrees of Separation started to really come to life.

Christmas was just a few weeks after the seminar and I remember sitting in my father-in-laws’ lounge, with 20 other people, telling them all about 6 degrees of separation.  To be honest, they were more sceptical about this whole idea than I was.   Then I had an, unwitting, helping hand. Read the rest of this entry »

In terms of how effective business networking can be, there are 3 distinct levels that you can choose to play at.

The first level is the least effective, but it’s also where the majority of networkers spend their time and effort.

Level 3, on the other hand, is the ‘nirvana of networking’ and it’s where the results you get from your efforts will pay the largest return.

So, the question I’m sure you’re asking probably goes along these lines.  What are the different levels of networking, how can I identify them and how do they differ from one another? Read the rest of this entry »